16th February 2018

Practice attempt at satire

Behold, our president.

Trump, strong and smart, has finally been elected to lead or glorious country. No longer will the low income, poor living conditions, unwanted job stealing job stealers be able to steal our jobs. Our mighty wall shall block out the sun for these insignificant ants. Our leaders strong, large hands were the first to start building our wall when he wrote his name on a piece of paper, the sweat on his brow filled our hearts and soul with the enthusiasm to construct our impenetrable, impassible barricade.

Our commander, shall stop all pesky inquiries into our most sacred of traditions, we shall now be able to shoot and kill any and all who oppose us with no consequences what so ever. People all around the world are too simple to understand that the only way to defend ourselves is to arm ourselves. Some day I hope for all students, teachers and lunch ladies to carry guns and protect them selves again crazy school kids with guns.

The wisdom of our elder supersedes and overcomes all other so called scientists or specialists. The day of the world exploiting our former presidents low intellect is now over. The myth of global warming does not fool our brilliant chieftain. The world cannot be warmed, it is not some type of stove or pot on a fire. We shall continue to use are factories and transport with no repercussions what so ever. We should increase the amount of our production so that all other countries under the spell of these witches and trickers may follow us and ignore all outlandish remarks of global destruction.

Your legendary ruler was able to demonstrate his diplomacy and kindness after he rekindled the bond between our former all, Russia. The so called “allies” of the all powerful, mostly, United States of America have forsaken us after discovering the brotherhood between the two greatest countries in the universe, and although our communist neighbour has much to learn from us, we are here guid them, a testament to this countries amazing leadership.

My god, my saviour, protects me. I fear no evil as my shepherd proves his authority consistently with the demonstrations of this great countries nuclear arsenal, no other country can possibly compete with ours as they have neither the knowledge or ability to create such weapons.

Respond now!

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